All Comments on 'Long Sentence-run on'

Nope

Good job! At least, you call it ULD.

5

Good one!

Just meaningless gibberish! No storytelling!

I, huh, find the, oh, yeah, interjections at the beginning of every spoken sentence very distracting.

That was a decidedly happier outcome than the devastation Michael Chopin left in his wake. What a firecracker you’ve created in Angelique. It’s impossible not to fall in love with her. Left me with a perma-smile. Thanks for the literary pick-me-up to go with my morning coffee.

boring and all over the place

Why is this in LW?

Love your work. Keep it up 👍

Thanks. Always love your writing.

It would be good if your anal play in stories dwelt a bit more with aroma and taste. Usually showered before a date means not much of both. After a day together, especially a hot summer day, and the butt is hmmmm, just much more.......enticing?

5/5

Beautiful story but should it not have been placed in “Romance”? 5*

Good for those two tracking that deadbeat douchebag down; as much as one was a fling and the other a terrible henpecking religious nut of a wife, neither one deserved to be stuck as a struggling single mother.

Nice story I enjoyed it

Jamie

Please let it be the last part. thx

This belongs in ROMANCE, JimBob. Ya gotta have husband and wife to be LW.

I come to this site to read erotica. Anyone that says different is a liar. But I wish to read a really good story first and foremost, and then hope it is liberally interspersed with wicked hot monkey sex. On most stories, after a bit, I do find myself wishing it would get to the sex. On yours however, I find myself wishing to find out what happens next.

Did he get back with Faith? Did he have a freeway with Faith and Angelique? Did they find Michael and castrate him? You keep me interested in what's going on with the characters, what's upcoming for the characters, and oh yeah, throw in some fucking.

For those complaining after the first installment of Long Sentence, how about you STFU and let the man write? He gave a pretty damn satisfactory continuation here. Or here's a thought, if you don't like his stories, don't read. When you see JimBob44 pop up, keep on scrolling. Here's another thought, try writing your own. Go ahead, give it a shot.

Authors here do this for free. Yes there are some atrocious ones. They can't spell, they can't form a sentence. They don't appear to have coherent thoughts even. But most are doing their best, and some, and I believe this author to be among them, are pretty damn good. So give constructive criticism. Say something to help the author improve. But if all you can do is just complain for the sake complaining, just go away. 5/5 stars, JB.

Dewey Cheatham

I loved that Faith was comforted, but basically on her own. You break up with a guy to pursue a married man. What she expect? She gets the prize of single mother now. He doesn't punish her. That's good. He also doesn't reward her which is better. Too many white knight characters on this website.

Super!!!

I'm definitely pinning Michael Chopin as a protagonist. 💋

The lack of English content renders the diatribe irrelevant

Your sklil at consistantly balancing dialogue and action is truly remarkable. I know of only one writer who is your equal. The other thing is you are, as Mr. Clemens stated, "long enough to cover the subject and short enough to be interesting." Thank you for sharing it with us.

A good story but trying to read with all of that stuttering is an unnecessary distraction

Absolutely loved it. Five big stars! Really hot story. Thanks for sharing your story with us.

Ended much better than it started. 5/5

god damn pussy eating mother fucking good!

Why is this here?

Creeperclaw wrote:

“Good for those two tracking that deadbeat douchebag down; as much as one was a fling and the other a terrible henpecking religious nut of a wife, neither one deserved to be stuck as a struggling single mother.”

Yes, they do! One refused to obey her husband (her own standards per her beliefs) to learn to be a good wife to him. The other chose to have an affair with a married man. They were free to choose their actions, but not the consequences.

Didn't care about what happened between him and faith. But him and angelique was a nice ending glad it was happy. Thanks for writing.

De Gard exists in my mind next to 'Flatland' well done

One of the best authors on this site!

It is legitimate and intelligent to have and discuss differences of opinion. But to tell someone that they should not express their opinion, especially because you don't agree with it, that's being a bully, a tyrant if you have the means to silence the offending commenter. And bullies and tyrants need to be confronted and neutralized. Eventually they almost always are; its so comforting: Go Musk!

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The first chapter of this story line is about a selfish cruel asshole who needs to have his ass handed to him. Eventually it will be. This story involves some of the same people, but I didn't get, or maybe appreciate, the connections. I kept waiting for the author to redeem himself or the Chopin character in this story. Too bad it didn't happen. I found the story pretty bland, and suspect the author's reason for writing it is more interesting than the story itself. But your circus, . . ., have at it. Thanks for the effort. And thanks for allowing anonymous comments. Any author who doesn't is a coward, and missing out on some much needed advice.

Man I thought when he went to rescue Faith from pit with Angelique he was going to let the skank back into his good graces..thanks for killing that thought lol

Why did Trenton leave pregnant Faith? How can Angelique trust him and hope for him after this? So, let's say she gets pregnant by someone after some party and what? Will he switch to a new ass again? No shame, no conscience. A jumping grasshopper. You can't treat women so superficially.

It looks more like a spin-off than a continuation. What connects with the previous part? Just Faith?

brilliant 5*

Ohh i like this second one better because the main characters are more personable and Trenton and Angelique story was fun to read.

Good story and comment on how could she trust him for leaving Faith. He didn’t leave her she wanted to fuck others and he let her go . That’s what any self respecting man would do. He was friendly towards her and even helped her get over fucking the married guy that got her pregnant but it’s not his responsibility. I even heard a story where this guy with three kids caught his wife cheating after she was pregnant with her fourth which turned out to not be his but the court wanted him to pay child support. That is backwards legal system if true . Every man and woman should take responsibility for their actions. If you want to fuck and not get diseases or have a kid try to use condom. Girls have more options like making guy use condom, birth control pills , iud and just not jumping on every cock in site to at least try to avoid std’s. The crazy ness over abortion can be somewhat controlled with responsible people at least attempting to not get pregnant if you’re not ready .

A little different than your usual. It’s really good. How Angelique suddenly appeared in TN was a surprise. Trenton is no dummy, he was probably sacred that she had a bow and quiver nearby. It would have fit if you had him piss himself.

Well written as usual. I really enjoy how characters from other stories are weaves into this story and other stories. Really nice reading time. I was definitely entertained all the way. So 5 stars has been earned.

Sooo, when y'all gonna post another one? I'm intrigued. 5 stars, btw. S. F.

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...

For the Anon 9 comments down. How can she trust that if she cheats on him and gets pregnant by another dude that he won't leave her? That's easy she can't! There consequences for cheating and she would need to take accountability for being unfaithful. Just like Faith had to take accountability for breaking up with Trenton so she could sleep with a married man and ended up being a single mother.

Not sure what is up with some commenters. Trenton did nothing wrong. Nor did Faith cheat with Trenton. They were not exclusive and they only dated several times over the summer. Faith was assuredly banging the asshole Michael during her internship. And she got pregnant. That is on her and Michael. Trenton did nothing wrong and Angelique knew that. Faith decided to have the child. Whatever budding romance she and Trenton had, ended with her wanting to see other people. As he noted, in all likelihood ahe was already having sex with someone else before that. Who knows. And yes he is hurt that she got impregnated by another man when he thought they had something building. She chose to sleep with a married man. She bought into Michael's bs. She and Michael did not take adequate steps to ensure no pregnancy. She put her life and future in jeopardy. It is not on Trenton.