If You Only Knew

No sooner had I thought about it, when Laura came flying through the front door and into the kitchen where I currently stood, leaning against the counter with my arms crossed, grinning. One look at my face and the jig was up.

"What're you up to?" she grinned, "I can tell by the look on your face that there's something going on in that devious mind of yours, Bryan."

"Did you bring a swim suit?" I asked, glancing back over my shoulder through the kitchen window and out onto the patio.

"I've got one in the sports bag out in my car," she knowingly smirked, "I figured you were throwing a party, because you and I both know that your contract is rock solid, you little shit. Why do you think I drove my car out here instead of riding with Nathan?"

"So, how did you like the paper I wrote?" I asked, knowing that I did well on it.

"You're not going to be one of those who always have to be told how good they are;" she smirked, "Are you?"

"What do you think, Laura?" I chuckled.

"I think that you're full of shit sometimes," she giggled.

"I second that," laughed Nathan, who had remained silent until now.

"Go change while Nathan and I take all this food out to the grill," I laughed, "Then you can come out and play with the big kids."

"You little shit," said Laura, sharply smacking me on the ass as she ran to the front door, giggling like a schoolgirl the entire way.

~~~~~~

Nathan and Kyle were in charge of moving the food from the kitchen to the table out by the pool. I was responsible for cooking not only the chicken, but at Kyle's and Kelly's request, some steaks I had been saving for a special occasion, but I figured, "What the hell, this occasion is special enough to suit me so, why not?"

~~~~~~

I was standing at the grill cooking when I heard an extremely venomous tone in Laura's voice as she asked, "What in the hell are you doing here, Patricia Warner?"

"I asked her to have lunch with us," I replied, as I turned around to find Laura standing there wearing a bright green bikini, looking even more beautiful than Trish, or any other woman I'd ever seen, for that matter. My voice suddenly disappeared and I felt a warm tingle starting in my groin, as the crotch of my pants began to tighten. Thank God I was wearing a pair of cut-off's, as the erection I was beginning to develop would've been obvious to everyone had I been wearing my swimming trunks.

"You do know that she's married, don't you?" Laura asked me.

"Is that true?" I asked, glaring at Trish.

"Yes," she uncomfortably replied, with a look of fear now clearly written across her face. "But only technically. I caught him with another woman the day after we came back from our honeymoon so, I threw him out."

By this time tears were beginning to fall down her cheeks again, but as opposed to being loud and acting like a horse's ass, I simply looked at her and coldly said, "I think it's time for you to leave." Then I turned to Laura and said, "Would you mind finishing what I started while I take her back home?"

"Sure thing, sweetie," she replied, glaring at Trish.

~~~~~~

"I'm really sorry if I hurt you, Bryan," Trish said, as I pulled into her driveway.

"Don't worry about it," I disgustedly replied, "It was my fault, because I should've known better than to trust you to start with."

"How can you be so cruel, Bryan?" she cried, getting out of my car, "I thought you were different, I thought you had a heart."

"I do," I calmly replied, "But you've already broken it twice now, and I'm not going to let you do it a third time. Goodbye, Trish, I hope you have a good life, I really do." And then I reached over and pulled my car-door shut; backed out into the street, and then drove away with silent tears raining down my face and a deep ache in my heart.

~~~~~~

When I arrived back home, the first thing I noticed was that Nathan's and Kyle's car were gone, and the only one left still in the driveway belonged to Laura. It was less than a half hour ago that everyone was here, making me wonder where they all were.

"Hello?" I said, as I walked into my house, "Is anyone home?"

"In here, sweetie," replied a now familiar female voice.

I walked into my den to find Laura sitting on the couch watching the television. The moment she saw me, she rose to feet, then pulled me into her arms and asked, "Are you alright?"

"No," I said, tears beginning to sting my eyes, "I'm not alright, but I guess that's what I deserve for being so trusting, huh?"

"No, baby," she sadly replied, holding me closely to her, "You didn't deserve that, but because you've got such a beautiful heart, and an even greater mind, some people mistake your kindness for weakness."

All at once and for reasons that I didn't know at the time, I felt my body going limp and I began to cry like I've never in my life done before...not ever. Laura simply held on and guided me to sit next her on the couch as I continued to weep. All of the anguish I felt from all of the shit I'd taken over the years suddenly came pouring out of me; and before I knew it, I found myself bawling my eyes out while Laura still held onto me as though her life depended on it.

~~~~~~

"Do you feel better now," she asked, once I began to regain my composure.

"I guess," I sniffled, "How could I have been so stupid to trust her again?"

"Because you're just like me," she softly replied, wiping my tears away with the palm of her hand, "When you love someone, you do it freely and with all of your heart."

"But what about....."

I was suddenly interrupted by the sound of my front door as it crashed open with a loud "BOOOOM," that knocked Laura and I both, off of the couch and onto the floor, followed by a blinding flash of light. Smoke suddenly filled the room and it was all I could do to breathe without coughing my lungs out and my eyes were stinging to the point that I almost couldn't see. Then I felt someone grab me by the throat and lift me to my feet as a deep voice growled, "I've got you now, you little mother fucker, and you're going to regret the day you ever stole from us.

I remembered my training at that moment, and in fit of pure anger and rage; I grabbed the hand that was around my throat. I turned and flipped the asshole that had a hold of me over my shoulder and onto the floor. And before he could make a counter move, and while still holding onto his arm, I quickly put all of my weight on it as I twisted it in the opposite direction until I heard the distinct sound of the bones breaking. As his arm snapped, I heard this son-of-a-bitch scream as though his guts were being ripped out, and once he was immobile; I gave him six hard, consecutive punches the face, which guaranteed he wouldn't be waking up anytime soon.

As the smoke began to clear, I saw another man making a move toward Laura as she lay unconscious on the floor. He hadn't seen me yet and I moved away quickly to make sure that he wouldn't either. Both men were armed to the teeth, but I had managed to take a 9mm pistol off of the bastard that was now lying unconscious on the floor of my den. I aimed the weapon at the other man, and watched s he knelt down next to Laura. Right before his hand touched her face; I yelled "HEY ASSHOLE," making him look directly at me. He never even had the time to draw his own weapon, as I had already placed the red dot from the pistol's laser sight right between his eyes and pulled the trigger. The shot blew the back of his head all over the wall behind him, and knocked him a good six or seven feet away from Laura, as he lay in the floor, dead.

~~~~~~

"Are you alright?" I asked Laura, as she opened her eyes to discover that we were outside by the pool.

"What happened, Bryan?" she asked, with fear evident in her tone of voice. Once I explained what had happened and that I had called the police, she looked at me and said, "You know who's responsible for this, don't you?"

"Sure I do, it was Garland Ferguson of Bell Helicopters," I calmly smiled, "And because his men tried to hurt you, I'm going to kill him."

"I don't think so," replied the voice of Nathan, coming up behind me.

"And why not," I angrily asked, "It wasn't you that they tried to kill, it was me and Laura. And there's nothing you're going to do to stop me either, Nathan."

"Look Bryan," he said, gently touching my shoulder.

"No, God dammit," I replied, shaking him off and standing up to face him, "You look; I've been letting people push me around my whole life. I've had enough and I'm not going to let it happen again...not ever."

Before Nathan could respond, the sounds of the police car's sirens coming up the driveway temporarily halted our conversation, but not before Nathan said, "This isn't over yet."

"You've got that shit right," I angrily spat.

~~~~~~

"Would someone care to tell me what the hell happened here?" Officer Charles Jones asked.

"Yeah," I replied, "These two assholes broke into my house and tried to kill Doctor Matthews and me."

"Oh, so, you're going to tell me that you're the reason they didn't succeed," Officer Jones sarcastically laughed, "Is that about right, bad ass?"

"Oh, so you think this shit is funny?" I asked, "Well, screw you, cop."

"How would you like to go to jail, you long-haired little punk?" growled Officer Jones, "This looks more like a drug deal gone bad, in my opinion."

"What would you know about drug deals, when all you do is ride around in that car, wasting tax-payer's money so you can sit on your fat fucking ass," I viciously spat, "You go right ahead and arrest me then. And when you lose your badge after I sue you and the city for wrongful arrest, I'm going to beat the ever-loving shit out of, you fucking idiot cocksucker."

"That's it, asshole," Jones said, grabbing me by the arms and throwing me, facedown, onto the hood of his squad-car, "Put your hands behind you back. You're under arrest."

"FUCK YOU," I yelled.

After placing the muzzle of his weapon to the back of my head, he pulled the hammer back and hissed, "If you don't put your hands behind your back, I'm gonna blow your fucking head off, asshole."

"I don't think so," Nathan said, drawing his own weapon and placing it to Jones' head, "Drop the gun, Jones...NOW"

"Are you crazy?" Jones asked, in a panicked voice, "I'm a police officer, for fuck's sake."

"No you're not," Nathan laughed, "You're a bully. Now drop the fucking weapon."

Jones dropped his weapon and backed away from me, and after handing his own weapon to me; Nathan reached over took and Jones' handcuffs from his own duty belt, and then hand-cuffed his fat ass to the steering wheel of his squad car.

Then he took the keys out of the squad car and shot five holes in the radiator with Jones' weapon, and after pulling his wallet from his back pocket, Nathan produced a badge and credentials, then angrily said, "Just so that you know, my name is F.B.I. Special Agent Nathan Brice, and you're under arrest, you fat fuck."

"You can't do that," Jones hissed, "What're the charges?"

"Well, let's see," Nathan laughed, winking at me and Laura, "Not only have you falsely accused an innocent man of wrong doing, but you've committed police brutality, along with interfering with a Federal Investigation, not to mention making slanderous accusations against an innocent, as well as a, Straight A, college student."

"How the hell was I supposed to know?" Jones asked, "Nobody told me."

"That's because you're a dumb-ass," Nathan chuckled, "But I'm going to see to it that you never wear a badge again, and when that's done, my young friend here is going to kick your ass."

~~~~~~

"Why didn't you tell me you were F.B.I., Nathan," I asked, as the paramedics were loading the dead man into one ambulance, while they took the asshole that was still alive into another.

"I'm really sorry about that, Bryan," he sincerely replied, "But you could've really jeopardized the whole investigation if you'd known."

"Did you know?" I asked Laura. She looked at the ground without answering me, and my heart literally broke wide open, as I realized that someone whom I loved with all my heart, had not only betrayed me, but lied to me as well.

"I'm going to leave here," I quietly said, "And when I come back, I want both of you out of here."

"Bryan, honey, wait," Laura cried, opening her arms, "Please...."

"NO," I shouted, quickly backing away from her, "Just go away," and then I turned and walked to my car."

~~~~~~

Because of my testimony before a Federal Grand Jury, several indictments were handed down shortly thereafter. Thinking they would get lighter sentences, Garland Ferguson, as well as all of his cronies, threw themselves at the mercy of the court. The judge wasn't moved in the least, and they each received sentences of sixty years, without the possibility of parole.

~~~~~~

"You can't just leave us, Bryan," Kelly cried, upon hearing the news that I had dropped out of college, and was going away for an indefinite period of time, "Where will you go, and what will you?"

"I've got to get out of here, Kelly," I sadly replied, my heart now completely broken, "I need to go away somewhere for a while, somewhere I can heal."

"What about Laura?"

"What about her," I painfully spat, "She'll be fine when the next unsuspecting student comes along and buys into her bullshit."

"You think I don't see how you two act around one another," Kelly pointedly said, "You're in love with her, aren't you, Bryan?"

"This house belongs to you and Kyle now," I said, changing the subject, "Tell Kyle that I said goodbye."

"You take care of yourself, Bryan," Kelly cried, as she launched herself into my arms, "We love you so very much."

"I know," I replied, my voice faltering as I began to lose my composure, "I love you guys, too, Kel."

~~~~~~

Chapter Five

FOUR YEARS LATER

I had moved all over the country, but at the time, was living in Key West, Florida, again, under an assumed name with one of many fake ID's I'd bought before I left. I hadn't written a single word since my last book, but it had continued to sell, and my publisher eventually had to send it back to press eleven times to fill all the orders that were still coming in, almost four years after its release. It also got elevated to the status of "Required Reading" in almost every university in the country, as well as halfway around the world in The United Kingdom.

And although my bank account was very fat by now, I couldn't access any of the money, as that would've given anyone who might be looking for me, the opportunity to find me. Still though, I did take seven hundred and fifty-thousand dollars in cash out of my account before I disappeared from sight. Even after my extensive travels, there was still more than enough to lease a small house for the next two years, as well as keep my lights on and my refrigerator stocked.

I got a job working as a cook in a restaurant called, "The Copper Kettle", up north of home, on Islamorada. My boss's name was Amanda Walton, and she was a very kind and gentle soul. She was somewhere in her mid to late fifties, (nobody actually knew her age) and she was one of the sweetest people I had ever met. Well, maybe not the sweetest person I'd ever met, but then again, that person, whom I also deeply loved and missed more than life itself had betrayed me, hence the reason I was here to begin with.

~~~~~~

I had hired a private investigator to look in on my parents and let them know that I was okay, as well as the reason for my not contacting them. And that was because if they were questioned by anyone, then they could honestly say that they didn't know where I was, ensuring their safety. Don't get me wrong, I would call them from time to time and talk to them. I knew that my Mom and Dad would rest easier when they heard the sound of my voice, and were assured by me personally, that I was alright. I only did it randomly, and never from the same phone or state.

~~~~~~

Although I had traveled to many places in the past four years, not a night went by that I didn't dream of Laura. Kelly had been right in saying that I was in love with her, and when I finally opened my mind enough to take an honest look into my heart, I came to the realization that I had always been in love with her. I still remembered the very first time I ever laid eyes on her, and how gracefully beautiful I thought she was. The memory of her that was etched the deepest in my mind, was of the day I saw her in a bikini for the first time. She as built like nothing I'd ever seen before, and while I've never been good at judging a woman's bust size, I am more than sure that Laura had nice sized breasts, enough for more than a handful. I remember how flat and tan her stomach had been, and her hips were just wide enough to make her exciting in my eyes. God I missed her so much.....

~~~~~~

The year was nineteen seventy-nine, I had just turned twenty five, and now I stood at a height of six feet, two inches; and weighed two hundred and twenty pounds. My hair had grown down past my waist by this time, and still; I felt so lost. I had been gone for ever three, almost years now, and I was homesick, but I knew better than to go back. I would have to face Laura again, and I still wasn't sure if I was ready for that. What would she say if she knew that I was in love with her? The one thing I knew for certain was that she was almost seven years older than me and she would, more-than-likely, think my feelings for her were nothing more than some old boyhood crush. Little did I realize what lay in wait for me just beyond the horizon?

~~~~~~

A couple of weeks later I had received word from the private investigator I'd hired, that my Mom was terminally ill, and that the specialists had given her less than six months to live. There was no doubt left in my mind now as to whether or not I should go back home. This was my mother's life that was delicately hanging in the balance, and now there was no way on God's green earth that I was going stay away any longer, to hell the consequences. After I called the utility company in Key West and made arrangements to have the power shut off, I emptied the contents of my refrigerator into the trash; and then put all my clothes in the car that I bought when I first disappeared, and took off toward home later that night.

~~~~~~

The travel time from Key West to my parent's home was a little over thirty-one hours, and I drove it straight through. I stopped to eat and rest, of course; hell, I even hit a truck stop and rented a shower to wake my ass up. It most certainly did the trick, and as I pulled into my parent's drive way, I looked at my watch to discover that it was two-fifteen in the morning, of the following day after I'd left Key West.

~~~~~~

Because I still had my old house keys, I let myself into my parent's house. I walked from the living room into the den to find my father asleep on the couch with the T.V still on.

"Dad," I softly said, while gently shaking his shoulder, "Dad, wake up."

The moment he opened his eyes, and saw that I was kneeling at his side, his eyes filled with tears as he leaned up and wrapped his arms around me and cried, "Bryan, you're home! We've all missed you so very much, son, I...." he was so overwhelmed that he couldn't continue, only cry and hold onto me as if his life depended on it.

Suddenly I heard Mom's voice coming from down the hall softly crying, "Bryan? Bryan is that you, baby boy?"

Dad let go of me, smiling and nodding his head in the direction of Mom's voice, and said, "Your mother's awake, boy. Why don't you go and say hello?"

I walked on unsteady legs down the hall until I got to the door of my parent's bedroom, and the moment I saw my mother, I felt my heart about to cave in on it self. Where there were once bright shining blues eyes, now were hazy blue dots within a mass of blood-shot capillary veins. Her hair had seemingly turned gray over night, what was left of it, that is. Her skin was pallor and her body small and frail. Still though, she held her arms out to me and cried, "Hi baby, I'm so glad you're home. I've missed you so very much, sweetie."